Introducing “Femilism”: Feminism Meets Realism in the Fourth Wave

It was June, 2000, when I walked in donning Old Navy boot-cut drawstring pants and a light-blue long-sleeve – Goodwill’s finest, my new balance, and my hair in a pony. With a knit bag draped diagonally over my shoulder in an allegedly nonchalant, yet hippie-inspired manner, I was woefully undressed and shamefully late for my first Working Women luncheon of my budding career as an advocate and activist for women and children’s rights, yet there were sesame noodles on my salad and Destiny’s Child on the intercom… yep, this was going to be a good day.

 

With more than fifty professional women focused on family-related issues encircling ten tightly-packed tables, one might imagine that getting acquainted would be not only easy, but unavoidable, yet there we sat awkwardly sipping our Arnold Palmers, waiting for some brave soul to make the first move.  While a handful of extraverts had sparked conversations hither and thither across the room, those of us socialized to avoid confrontation or controlling situations continued to nibble our stale pumpernickel, and awaited further instructions.  Thankfully, just as I was about to ask my my lunch companion her sign, the powers that be (at least in the Hyatt Conference Room 3A) took the podium, made a few opening remarks, and mercifully invited us to take part in the opening icebreaker – sharing our names, our businesses or organizations from which we hailed, and some precious yet non obvious fact about us.

 

“Important yet non-obvious fact?” I hurriedly queried myself, rustling through the files of the suburban regions of my soul (wasn’t about to share the workings of the inner city of self, but the values ensconced along the outer belt of psyche were legitimately up for grabs).

Be More Than an Activist – Be a FACTivist!

It’s true that we must raise our voices and make our presence known in these trying socio-political times.  However, action without education quickly turns proactive into reactive, and we are accused of acting out on emotion rather than hard data – aka SOFT LOGIC

So, our Fourth Wave Fact of the day to explore is why our birth control is of anyone else’s affair the groundbreaking case of Griswold v. Connecticut.

  • There was a time only men could buy contraception, for women considered profane
  • For some, this was a death sentence, if not of the body then of the soul

 

Sweet House in the Suburbs: A Stumble Down Amnesia Lane

One of my greatest joys as a parent (or perhaps as a mother) has been reading the “Little House” series of books aloud to my children.  I treasure this simpler, hearty, stolid, stalwart pioneer perspective, retold with beautifully descriptive detail, sense memories, and images which bring each scene not just to mind, but to life, as if we were guests in Ma’s front room, standing on the braided rag rug…

My most cherished appreciation of the “Little House” books is the living record Laura leaves of her precious childhood.  What a gift to preserve this specific memories, chiseled into time’s granite walls, for her legacy and the love and fascination of countless others and generations.  Her words and scenic descriptions denotes and honors without glorifying such a simpler, specific time in our American History, making her work personally and historically significant (perhaps vital!!)  In that same spirit, after sharing the most recent chapter in “Little Town on the Prairie” with my eight year old, I commenced to reflect upon the myriad memories I have of my childhood, and how delighted my children would and will be to have this living records

Episode One:  Earliest memory

Believe it or not, my first memory is of lying in my crib

Sing Out, Louise: Tunes to Grow On

As we march fourth into our next wave of Feminist Realism (Read:  We get now that being a woman is just really f*cking hard, and there’s no night course, leafy green, or miracle thigh-firming gadget that’s going to change that very real fact, so let’s deal with life as is and see if we can do a better job supporting ONE ANOTHER, rather than subscribing to the alleged  rugged American individiualism which leaves of fractured, fatigued, and lonely)

Today’s Tune 2 Grow On:

Im on the side of right

I’m on the side of not giving up my right

To get things done and get through the night

Yes, I’m on the side of right

I’m on the side of good

I’m on the side of you know you could

Lo

 

I’m on the side of truth

 

I’m on the side of light